Super-rantings?

Soon as I published the previous post, I was asked "Why dont you answer your own blog?" It usually comes to that doesn't it, regardless of my blog title being simply ramblings and musings. But hey, I'd much oblige ....

Part 1:
Keeping focus on what you really want. What do you really want? what's your focus?
What I really want is to live the simple life of retirement. Doesn't everybody? The challenge is how to experience that in the here and now by managing your opportunities. I've got time share that gives me a weeklong opportunity every year to take a vacation anywhere in the world. So far, I've actually taken those breaks. However, work does follow and you compromise a little. During this weeklong period of supposed adventure, its supposed to be quiet time to reflect on the beauty of life and be pampered by being loved. Unfortunately, my agenda of tranquility and laid-back wandering doesn't really fit those of others who'd really like to explore the sights.

Part 2:
Focus on being married to work/career or for life? Which one?
I specifically mused that for those of us who love family, as I surely do, then we all know its not that simple. Its complicated, particularly if there are things left and right that you have to jump to. Sandler's character had much of the same issues, and very nicely put it in the movie to his wife, work is a means to an end.

Family oriented should not be sidetracked by work. Like living your life?
Yep, there are components to families. The smallest group being father, mother, brother/sister. At this point I'm "father". For all the years that I've toiled, wouldn't it be nice to be good to yourself first? After all, you can't love others unless you can love yourself.

What if your family is far away?
Assuming that family is what I really want, and truly it is. I just don't want to be stuck in the "motions of family", thats quite a different thing from living. Admittedly, I've not called my son much. Then again, its just not my nature -- nor was it my father's. But its sure that when he was arround that we'd be off to lunch somewhere, singing at the karaoke, watching and playing billiards, meeting clients and making deals. In retrospect, its acceptance of the distance as a fact and making up for lost time. Now if only both sides realize this fact. Here's probably what catches my goat --- that I'd not paid enough attention and time to my Dad while he was alive and around by assuming he's doing his thing and was too busy. Who the hell cares about being busy? If you want your space, and its important enough like a nice long hug and heart to heart talks, then by gosh take that opportunity. Don't waste time online or on the phone arguing some moot and stupid point when you could be encouraging each other and professing undying love and happiness.

Make time for what you really want. Goes back to the same question... what do you really want?
Here are the things that I've done so far this week: watched two movies at the spur of the moment; went to the grocery and took all the meat I wanted; filled my fridge with Corona, Cerveza Negra, IBC original rootbeer (twist open crown), brie cheese, salsa for Tostitos; took the highways instead of the safer roads; turned off my GPS for the route; slept in late; slept late; wrote on this blog first; read my pocketbook; initiated discussions at work; indulged myself in Japanese cuisine. For all these things how many would be difficult and full of sidetracks if I let someone tell me what to do?

In retrospect through the first and second season of ABC's LOST there's a line that keeps being repeated enough. "Don't tell me what I can and can't do!" Lovely. And if you watch each episode it actually shows different aspects of life and the motivations for each one's actions due to the past experiences. Right now my hair and beard says call me Sawyer or James Ford. Then again my wild side is like Kate who just wants to start a new life but is held back. And perhaps its Jack who's got a pragmatic look at life and disbelieves miracles and its totally driven. Or could it be Desmond whose out to proove to others that he's worthy of respect. Then again isn't it Hurley who's just so bullet proof even at the loss of someone who truly understands him. Perhaps Charlie who's really trying so hard to change habits but people just won't trust him and give him a break. I'm hooked!

Enjoy living, enjoy life!
Ah, I need to get out sometime. Thats the only thing thats missing. A social life. But alas, my Xbox and surround sound provides me enough entertainment at the moment. Now if I could only get that laptop to run the media center....

Part 4:
An example of maintaining a goal vs. timing. What about getting what you want?
Is it what you want or what you need? Those are quite different things. Wants are excess and I've learned for all the disappointments in life to stick to things you really need as they are the ones worth the hell of a lot fighting for. Its sad truly that for all the things people want in life, say for example your original dream of wanted occupation growing up, sometimes it just won't happen the way you want it and you're shoved into a state of parallel where its close enough. A Filipino man, speaking English without an accent, growing up in the midst of American culture and friends, and I wanted to be an astronaut. Did it happen? Like duh! From the 70's you had to be either Russian or American born to opportunities and proximity that would allow such.

So its a child's dream. You take that expectation down a notch and hope of being an aeronautics engineer designing these planes and crafts blowing in the wind tunnel as a stepping stone. Nope, getting enrolled in flight school was just not possible. It would have been expensive for my parents.

So you take it down a further notch, and hope to design the systems being used. And thats where I was. Right now, my work protects all these systems that could launch Apollo or another Challenger into space. My analysis has helped protect companies that build commercial jets and experimental vehicles. I jet set around the globe and speak at conferences on security and threats. Some of you have even been brought around at some point of other to places as a result of the ride. :-)

Life is complicated, we all have our excuses. Sometimes those excuses makes the other person wait longer and in return gives hope to that other person holding on to that promise.
Truly. Perhaps the question was false hope? I've waiting long times in the past for miracles to happen and sometimes it just doesn't cut it if whats holding you back is that other person's negativity. Its a team effort, don't kill the goose that shits gold. Moreover, don't shoot yourself in the foot and nag me about things that I plan to do on my own time for my own reasons. I've been nagged most of my life as a child, and sorely thats probably to my dad missing in action and me being the eldest. So hey, I'm not taking it anymore. Thats 20-odd years of it and no more crap. As my bro used to say and paraphrased from Linkin Park (who's got a Pinoy decent member?) Its my way, its my way ... my way or the highway!